Boys are unique human being each with his own personality and temperament.
Who is a highly sensitive boy?
I saw a post on face book of a mom who expressed concerns over her 9 year old son whom she termed weak-natured because he was too emotional, kept to himself most of the time, rarely wants to play with other kids while his peers engaged in sporting activities, she finds he prefers staying at home, he is quite fearful, cries a lot when teased, bullied, or verbally corrected. She finds his constant meltdown troubling and not doing too well at school.
I guess the mom is not aware of the term highly sensitive boy.
HOW TO KNOW A BOY WHO IS HIGHLY SENSITIVE BOY
- Constant melt downs [uncontrolled tears].
- Too emotional.
- Loves hugs, been held and snuggles up a lot.
- He is not aggressive nor assertive.
- Picky eater.
- Can feel a deep sense of shame and guilt.
- Sensitive to pain and violent cartoons/movies.
- He takes mistakes personally.
- Deeply affected by what he sees, smells, taste and touch.
I listened to Ted Zeff from his book: The Strong Sensitive Boy. Sensitive boys are:
- Act as peacemakers.
- Concern about the human treatments of animals.
- Can easily empathize.
Dr. Elaine N. Aron, an expert on sensitivity and originator of the concept of the highly sensitive person, encourages parents to view sensitivity as gift. There is nothing feminine about being sensitive, we live in a world where it is seen as burden but its actually a gift to humanity that’s why sensitive people are changemakers, human right activist, great teachers, counselor, care-givers, climate change activist. What would our the world look like without people like these?
WHAT NOT TO SAY TO A SENSITIVE BOY
- Toughen up boy.
- You are too emotional stop being a sissy.
- Stop pretending it hurts that bad.
- Stop crying like girl.
- Stop manipulating me.
- Grow up
- Look at your brother he behaves more maturely.
- I don’t like your behavior.
- You are a disgrace to this family.
- Stop whimpering
EFFECT OF DEGRADING A SENSITIVE BOY
- Low self esteem
- Feels something is wrong with him.
- Mental Disorder
- Susceptible to sexual abuse.
- Low academic performance.
- Indulge in drugs and alcohol.
- Engage in risky sexual behavior.
- Joins a secret cults to toughen him up.
HOW DO I CARE FOR A HIGHLY SENSITIVE BOY
- Appreciate his sensitive personality.
- Teach him an ” I don’t care attitude towards teasing by other kids and adults.
- Encourage him to partake in outdoor activities.
- Ensure his school teachers and other family members is aware of his personality and how to manage him.
- Gentle discipline and correctional methods will work for him.
- Teach him to learn how to express himself and specify what he wants.
- Teach him time-out from a hostile situations which involves walking away.
- show him how to carry out breathing exercises when he feels overwhelmed emotionally.
- Stand up for him if he is been bullied.
- Never condone him been battered publicly.
- Celebrate him.
A SENSITIVE BOY IS A GIFT TO OUR WORLD
Looking forward to hearing from you and sharing tales about your sensitive son.